I met an individual two days ago who said to me ‘I’m so unlucky, I don’t get the opportunities I want in life’. I was so gobsmacked by the comment and I started thinking about how as individuals, we often miss on the things we want because of our thinking. That comment on its own was telling me a lot. The individual is firstly, thinking negatively, or is being a pessimist, and does not see any positivity in life.

Your attitude influences your thinking…

Of course life throws us challenges. And of course, you will attempt something in life, and you will fail. You will try to open doors, and they will be shut in your face. However, if you look at your failures, and the challenges and you start to think that that’s how your life is destined to be, of course it will turn out that way. This is because you have your own self-imposed limiting beliefs, and negative thought processes, and that is why you’re are unable to move from where you are, where you are currently facing failure, where you are currently stuck because of the challenges you have encountered, because of the roadblocks and the setbacks, and possibility tragedy you may have suffered, because, you simply believe, that you cannot, and will not achieve anything you want.

A lot of us like to focus on what we we’re unable to do, rather than that we are able to do. How often have you heard a person saying?

• ‘I am no good at this…’
• ‘I never know what to say…’

Just like the individual I met with two days ago, this is very typical.

Your thinking influences your behavior

Do you realise that when you continuously complain about how unlucky you are, if you focus on what you cannot do, and what you cannot achieve, do you realise that you are harnessing a negative thinking process? Because your attitude influences your thinking, and you’re thinking influences your behavior, when you proclaim how you see yourself, you in turn, say it to yourself, and to others, and you act out and behave in that way. Do you think that you are going to be able to achieve anything, anything at all, if you continue to see yourself like that, and think like that?

How do you move forward?

Many people fall into habits that become part of their daily ritual and find it very difficult to implement change. You see change is the key to transforming your life. You have to start seeing yourself differently, thinking differently, and doing different things differently, both in your personal and business lives so that you can start to see the results you want. For you to be able to make a positive, lasting change, you must first change your attitude, make a mental commitment and then make a physical commitment so that you can start behaving that way and achieving.

Stand up and hold your head high

Realise this: You’re on your journey to your destiny, your journey to your success. Sometimes you will become successful, but mostly, if not often, you will fail. Your conditions may be so adverse right now, that you feel so demoralized, that you feel like life is not worth living, you feel like the world could open up and swallow you whole. Its ok to cry, but don’t spend too much time on it. Stand up, brush yourself, and move on.

Focus on changing yourself instead of changing the world around you

You really cannot take responsibility for what people are doing in the world – that is not your problem. Those are not your issues. You also cannot concern yourself about what people are saying about the decisions that you take. Change yourself first.

My challenge to you? Be an optimist instead of a pessimist. See opportunities, rather than failure. See every day as an opportunity. Celebrate life.

‘We’re all inventors, each sailing out on a voyage of discovery, guided each by a private chart, of which there is no duplicate. The world is all gates, all opportunities’. Ralph Waldo Emmerson